Amazed and Confused

10 Apr

Again, months have passed and living has continued. I need to share. And I’ve chosen this format in hopes that those who cannot be burdened by my outburst, will choose to ignore it.

Right now, I am relieved, miserable, excited, weary, elated, and depressed. In short, I’m a mess.

After waiting for a year, and suffering through and almost continuous UTI that entire time….I finally got an appointment with a urogynecologist at the local med school campus…there are only three in the state. They are booked months in advance. So February began the adventure.

I’ve fallen, had my head examined…they did find a brain. My heart has been checked….and there is one of those too.

Then we began exploring the mess of vaginal mesh from a ten-year old bladder repair. A month ago a stone just smaller than a golf ball was found in my bladder through cystoscopy. Pain anyone? Although the video of the bladder was reminiscent of deep-sea diving on a beautiful virgin coral reef.

A week later, the culture showed malignant and squamous cells in abundance in the bladder. A consult with plastic surgery to explore the possibility of removing skin left after gastric bypass three years ago was scheduled. We were hoping that losing the sag would decrease the incidence of infection. Got approval for that.

Two weeks of abject stress and a FISH test (please don’t ask what the acronym means, I’m still clueless), I’m told everything is normal. It was a false positive on the malignant cells.

Another cystoscopy of the bladder confirms the stone has grown on mesh, but the bladder looks good.

So we proceed with surgery.

April 5…five days ago. my daughter checks me into surgery at 5 a.m. I’m checked in and taken to pre-op an hour or so later. When the anesthesiology resident hits me with the initial drug, I’m out in three seconds and on my way to surgery around 8:30. Three doctors are going to work on me.

The urologist begins. He removes the stone. There is something up with one of the ureters that had not been noted, so a stint is places. The urogynecologist is in the room and begins the process of repairing the bladder and removing any mesh that she can. Then the plastic surgeon comes in. Remember between doctors, the OR has to be reset. So 11 plus hours later I’m finally taken to recovery. And sometime after 9 p.m. I’m in a room.

I had a hangover the next morning. And I was and am trussed up like a thanksgiving turkey. Bandages and binder from ankles to boobs.

I’m FREAKING MISERABLE. Save me from mummy wrappings and irritated skin. I’m hooked up to 4 incision drains and a catheter. I finally hung everything around my waist on a belt.

I can only hope this will turn out to be so worth it.

Here’s the thing…Much thanks to my daughter for sticking it out through the surgery and losing her time off to me, my son for spending that first night with me, making me protein shakes and food, my spousal unit for picking me up and getting my meds and picking up my slack in the house and kitchen, my work family for supporting me and checking on me and reassuring me, and all the friends who have stuck it out while I waited….and waited to get this over.

Thursday I hope to lose the four drains and exchange the mummy wrappings for a more comfortable garment. With appropriate healing I’ll lose the catheter on the 18th.

And I hope I wake up. Today has been better by a smidge.

I have to study. I’m seriously behind in Anthropology and have to be completely caught up by Monday so I can take a test. And I have an Algebra test on Sunday. I’m finally on a path to complete the 3, now 9, hours I left undone 40 plus years ago for my Bachelor’s. And then I wish to do a graduate certificate in technical writing. Sounds like a fun thing to do in retirement! I have a little experience.

I have plans. I want to see my grandchild(ren?) grow up. I want to visit Romania and Dracul’s Castle, walk through a field of heather in Scotland, visit the cathedral’s of Paris, and wander the lands of Native American’s here and in Canada.

Oh, and I want Donald Trump and his ilk to disappear. (I had to say it)

Let’s get this show on the road and stop all the nonsense.

Such A Long Time

29 Aug

Almost a year has passed in a flurry of work and weariness and few accomplishments on the creative side of my life. I’ve learned, still learning if I’m honest, a new job. One in an environment only known from the consumer side!

But….

I’ve missed this. I’ve missed the quiet beauty of my wild pasture as seen from the barn where tools and tricks and wood and pallets await my return.

I’ve missed friends. The Bunco team disbanded when two jobs and an unwieldy schedule ran amok with my time and energy. I’m almost ready to begin again. I hope everyone is still up for a game or two…perhaps every other month.

I’ve missed an opportunity in  business with friends and fellow artisans. I so wanted to be available and just could not make it happen. I am going to teach classes however. Perhaps that will provide some redemption.

There is still much to do. There is a craft closet for my daughter. The trim in my newly renovated bathroom must be installed. Some further order must be restored to my home, although it is getting there. And then there will be random moments  I will entrust to my son’s tiny house conversion. We have a shed just waiting for this miracle to progress.

 

Slow Down, Moving Too Fast

14 May

Time is hurtling by me. And that’s a topic that recurs in my thoughts and ramblings with stunning regularity. Time.

How does one find the time to do the things that satisfy, make life worth living, when so much of our time is spent just trying to make a living?

You would think at my age I would have a better grasp of this. Yeah. You would think. But it has escaped me. This road I travel is one of accidents. It’s a take-it-as-it-comes road, good, bad, or indifferent, just deal-with-it-when-it-happens road.

I’m trying to take a right. Signing up for all the festivals and craft shows I feel like I can afford and posting to my Etsy shop and 7 or so other platforms is a beginning. But it is a slow go. And I know I’m not moving fast enough…time is moving too fast…it’s slipping by me and my desire to begin by traveling Arkansas with my wares is becoming a reality in slow motion because I’m trying to fund it the goal without making sales of my wares…but I am building a following one person at a time. I’m making contacts, passing out cards, receiving new invitations to participate…is this how it is done? Is this the beginnings of a success I’ve never known? I don’t recognize it as I have no experience of it.

Time. Do I have time to do this? The spousal unit thinks not. He has no confidence in me. He’s focused on my efforts to find a ‘job’. Yes…I do need a steady income source. But I need this creative outlet. I need to spend time in my ‘happy place’ and travel to the festivals and shows, local and not so local, set up and talk to people, enjoy the social aspects as well as the possibility of success.

Time. I want to add mono-prints and emulsion prints to my inventory. I’m stymied. I reach a point in the day where my energy has waned and I’m ready to immerse myself in a book. I need to learn to pull back from that…Time.

I’ve just indulged in such a self-absorbed rant. My apologies.

Here’s another post to my Etsy shop. It’s time.

4 x 6 Picture swapping photo frame. Rustic little picket fence.

4 x 6 Picture swapping photo frame. Rustic little picket fence.

Picture too. 4 x 6 picture swapping frame.

Picture too. 4 x 6 picture swapping frame.

www.etsy.com/shop/aFrameJob

 

It’s Hump Day

6 May

Can you hear that camel proclaiming the day? There truly are advertising geniuses out there. How many jingles can you hum or sing? How many ad quotes pepper your thoughts or speech? Oh yeah…geniuses.

I’m not one.

There is a lovely cardinal hovering around the window outside my workroom. He was perched on the fence when I first noticed him. Ah, Spring has sprung and the temps are hovering in the eighties this week. Time to consider opening the pool. The water will slowly warm and eventually we can spend an evening or two enjoying the stars.

Nights would be best. Either that or a full body suit for me. Either one would hide the many imperfections! Hehe…who cares? Every wrinkle and imperfection has been earned I think.

Today I’m posting again to my Etsy shop. Here’s the offering. Let me know what you think…or go shopping here!

4 x 6 Photo swapping frame. Rustic, country style, embellished with cotton florals.

4 x 6 Photo swapping frame. Rustic, country style, embellished with cotton florals.

Pretty in Green photo swapping 4 x 6 picture frame

Pretty in Green photo swapping 4 x 6 picture frame

Manic Monday

4 May

Okay. I’ll admit it. I’m graceless.

Saturday I spent a lovely day at the Arkansas’ Regional Innovation Hub Mini Maker Faire. The weather was beautiful. I met lots of people. Showcased my frames and made a few contacts for more events and education. I was stoked!

But tired. So I retired early with my Kindle. Turned all the lights out, snuggled up to Peanut…ahhhhhh.

Then the craving hit. Chocolate. I wanted chocolate. A peanut butter chocolate egg beckoned from the freezer. Now at this point the spousal unit was snoring. But I was undeterred. I closed my Kindle, slipped from under the covers, carefully made my way around the bottom of the bed, tiptoeing cautiously, only to catch my foot on a big, black, hairy dog and go flying into the floor!

Left knee hurts, can’t straighten the right elbow, knocked a small filling from the back of a front tooth, busted the upper lip a bit, and woke the spousal unit. Oh and I’m sore.

Yup. The dog’s on my list. And from now on I will allow my eyes to adjust to the ambient light.

Ah..clumsy is my middle name.

So, here’s today’s frame posting. Thanks for looking!

Photo Swap Frame Pretty in Pink

Photo Swap Frame Pretty in Pink

Pretty in Pink, Another View

Pretty in Pink, Another View

find

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Find it here. Only $24.

May Day and The Sun is Shining

1 May

Good day! May 1st finds me still unemployed and energetically, well as energetically as possible for a woman of a certain age, in pursuit of a dream. That being creating a living without a job.

There is much to learn.

Today’s Etsy finds in aFrameJob follow. I hope you like them and would so appreciate some honest feedback. If you’re seeing them posted all over the place, please forgive me. I’m trying to increase visibility. You can help! Just share my postings. And thank you in advance.

Tomorrow I will participate in the Arkansas Regional Innovation Hub Mini Maker Faire. My booth can be found in Craft World. Must say, this is beyond exciting. All the markets, fairs, festivals, events…get us out and about and meeting and greeting. Hopping about may be a great introduction to new places and spaces in Arkansas.

So here’s to May Day, also a Friday. Hope yours is splendid!

Farmhouse fancy, shabby or cottage chic, rustic, Southwestern...here's an eclectic bit of home decor for framing the moments of your life.

Farmhouse fancy, shabby or cottage chic, rustic, Southwestern…here’s an eclectic bit of home decor for framing the moments of your life.

A 5 x 7 picture slides behind the glass of this creation and can be hung horizontally or vertically.

And another Pic-ket, suitable for a standard 4 x 6 photo.

And another Pic-ket, suitable for a standard 4 x 6 photo.

The 5 x 7 is only $32.00. The 4 x 6 is $24.00. Both can be found here.

Fabulous for Friday

27 Mar

Today’s Etsy post features purple!

Featuring purple fleurs and my grand, this photo display can be yours. Just click below!

Featuring purple fleurs and my grand, this photo display can be yours. Just click below!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

aFrameJob is here.

If you are of a certain age you will remember purple people eaters. I wonder of the eater is purple or if the eater only eats purple people…That’s a debate for the philosophical intellectuals among us.

The simple act of posing a purple people eater debate proves I do not meet the conventional definition of a philosophical intellectual. Whoa!

Today has been a pretty good day. Hope it has been for you as well. If not, make the evening outstanding!

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s Time

26 Mar

Soooooo hard to believe how fast time flies these days. Although the sinus infection from Hades has slowed it down a bit for the past two weeks….doctor visit anyone? I really don’t want to go. Body, heal thyself.

Zach is gardening in the drizzly, cloudy weather we are experiencing today. The drizzly, cloudy stuff has become a common theme…and the temperature is dropping. We must keep our hopes up that warm weather and swimming will soon be upon us.

In the meantime, we await the new roof and the tree-trimming that has to precede it. Oh dear, home repair is expensive! We’ll also be shopping for a new hot water heater. I can’t wait to move to an on-demand version, energy-efficient and won’t crash through the floor!  The floor in that spot has a joist problem. Poor old house. Love it, but it is the money pit.

I’m taking my stoppered head to a place of comfort for a spell. Have a great day. Smell a few roses along the way.

Fanfares on Friday

20 Mar
My daughter at ten. Frame for sale.

My daughter at ten. Frame for sale.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Visit www.etsy.com/shop/aFrameJob

Ah yes. Three in four days. I really have to do something about my awful photos!

Dear daughter:

I needs help with pictures.

Love,

Mom

She and the grand visited for dinner tonight! Such a joy. We’re hanging out a couple of days next week. Oh yeah! Can’t wait.

 

 

 

Up Today

18 Mar

Adding a second display board to my Etsy collection today. Glad to be here and get this done!

Using Ms. Zoe's Pic again. Notice the change in floral color!

Using Ms. Zoe’s Pic again. Notice the change in floral color!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This one is a bit knotty. Love that. Adds character

This one is a bit knotty. Love that. Adds character

 

 

 

 

 

 

I spent a few moments in the barn today and I wore a MASK, hoping to avoid any more sick days due to inhalation of dust, sawdust, and whatever other detritus flies in the face of a 50 plus year old animal structure. It is well weathered and worn, but I do so love it!

Also spent time discussing mono-printing at the local art store. The young man who spoke to me was so full of ideas! Loved it. Can’t wait to get started. A new craft!!! Oh my!!!! Add it to my collection of have-to/had-to try its. This one may be a keeper.

Until next time!

 

Dawne Design

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